Poop Training Made Easier: Strategies Every Parent Needs to Know
When it comes to potty training, pee usually gets all the attention. But let’s be honest: poop training is where things get tricky. Many parents tell me their child will happily pee in the potty but completely refuse when it comes to number two.
If that’s your situation, you’re not alone. Poop struggles are actually more common than you think, and there are some very real reasons why.
1. Fewer Chances to Practice
When we work on pee training, kids get multiple opportunities to practice every day. You can increase fluids, and suddenly your child is peeing six or more times a day - that’s six learning opportunities!
Poop, on the other hand, usually happens only once, maybe twice a day. That’s significantly less practice, which means progress will naturally take longer. When you think of it this way, it makes total sense why poop in the potty usually lags behind pee.
2. Feeling Exposed
Think about the difference between diapers and the potty:
In diapers, kids are covered and contained.
On the toilet, they’re suddenly naked and exposed.
That shift can feel vulnerable to little ones. It’s also why many kids hide behind the couch or go to a corner when they poop - they want privacy and a sense of safety. Moving to the potty takes away their “comfort spot,” and it can take some time for them to adjust.
3. It Feels Like Losing a Body Part
This one might sound funny, but it’s very real. Some kids describe their first poop in the potty as feeling like “a part of them is falling out.”
From a child’s perspective, that can feel scary. Since birth, they’ve always had the sensation of poop pressed up against their bottom - something familiar and consistent. Now, suddenly, it drops into the potty and disappears. That loss of comfort can create real anxiety.
4. It Takes Time (and Kids Are Impatient!)
Here’s the hard truth: pooping takes longer than peeing. And for a busy toddler who would much rather keep playing, sitting still on the potty for several minutes can feel like torture.
It’s simply more convenient to squat and go wherever they are instead of pausing play to head to the bathroom. This is one reason accidents and resistance are so common.
5. Constipation Issues
Withholding poop is very common during potty training. Sometimes, children avoid going because they feel nervous or uncomfortable, but over time, this withholding can lead to constipation. Constipation makes bowel movements painful or difficult, which can create a cycle of even more avoidance.
Signs of constipation may include:
Dry or hard stools
Straining or struggling to pass a bowel movement
Complaints of stomach pain
Decreased appetite
If you notice these symptoms, it’s important to check in with your child’s pediatrician before focusing on potty training. Addressing constipation first can make the process smoother and far less stressful for your child.
From Struggles to Strategies
Now that you know why poop training can feel so overwhelming for kids (and parents!), let’s talk about the good news - there are strategies you can use to help.
In the next section, I’ll share simple, practical ways to make pooping in the potty less scary, more comfortable, and eventually…successful.
✅ Normalize Pooping in the Potty
Model the process yourself whenever possible. Invite your little one to join you (or an older sibling) in the bathroom so they can see what happens. You can also read books about pooping or role-play the process with dolls or stuffed animals. The more familiar it feels, the less intimidating it becomes.
✅ Start Poop Training Alongside Pee Training
Don’t leave poop out of the conversation! Talk about the “poop feeling” just as you do the “pee feeling,” and remind your child that both belong in the potty. Starting at the same time helps prevent confusion or resistance later.
✅ Build in Relaxation Time
Before expecting your child to poop, give them a few minutes to relax their body while sitting on the potty. Try 4–5 minutes of deep breathing, reading a short book, or playing with a fidget toy. These calming activities help relax the pelvic floor muscles, making it easier for poop to pass.
✅ Use Positive Language About Poop
Avoid words like “messy,” “yucky,” or “stinky” when talking about poop. Negative labels can make kids feel embarrassed or ashamed. Instead, use neutral or positive language - poop is just something every body does, and it’s a healthy, normal part of growing up.
✨ Final Thoughts
If your child is struggling with poop training, remember - it’s not defiance or laziness. There are real reasons it feels harder than pee training, and with patience, support, and the right strategies, they will get there.
If you’re still feeling stuck or overwhelmed, I offer one-on-one troubleshooting sessions to give you personalized strategies that actually work - so you can move forward with less stress and more success.